A Family Feud question and answer explain it all:

Q: ”Name something a man keeps in his pants for emergencies…”

A: “A gun.”

Last night when I got in, I did my usual.  I turned on Family Feud to get a few laughs.  It was a rerun, I had seen it before, but in light of the tragic events in Connecticut this past Friday this particular answer during the fast money round got to me.

First off, I feel the need to say that my entire heart goes out to the families, friends and community of Newtown, Connecticut.  We are all collectively feeling the pain of those 20 children and 8 adults lost.  Though the news reports 26 adults, I count the shooter and his mother among those whom we mourn.

People will not like that I acknowledge him in this, but I do.  The fact is, we may never really know what led to shooter Adam Lanza taking an automatic weapon into Sandy Hook Elementary School and murdering these people.  The latest reports cite that his mother, Nancy Lanza, was petitioning the court to have Adam committed and that may be what set him off.  I believe this is entirely possible…

But before I break into this, let’s go back and discuss a few other points.  I believe that a perfect storm of circumstances led us to this point; I would be remiss in not addressing as many as I feel I can.

 Gun culture in America is insane.  The fact that there are so many Americans who believe that guns solve problems is not only an extremely dangerous mindset, but also both sad and chilling.  I live in a city where we routinely have an average of 250 – 300 murders due to gun violence a year.  Even days before the school shooting in Newtown, two young men opened fire on a SEPTA train platform a few blocks from my home.  The same day of the Connecticut shooting, a man shot his ex girlfriend and then himself inside a casino in Las Vegas and there was a riot at 22nd & Lehigh avenue where a girl had been jumped and shots were fired.  The shooting on public transit was widely reported, the riot and shots fired at a high school in Philadelphia was not… I feel that in itself is an injustice perpetrated on the people of Philadelphia by our own media organizations.  We live by 6 ABC news in Philadelphia.  It’s been a staple in my life as long as I can remember… “there’s that news van again…”  But they weren’t there at Murrell Dobbins High School (where my godsisters graduated from) on Thursday.  No, the news was focused on the horrific acts 172.2 miles away from it’s citizens.  I don’t begrudge them reporting that news; however, my understanding is that local news affiliates report LOCAL news.  I got this news via a friend on Facebook who was picking up her own young child not far away.  As I read her post I was thinking of that moment in which things can horrifically change; if shots had rung out while she was there, what would have happened? Mind you, my friend is also pregnant…

But even with all the carnage in the previous paragraph, there are people in our country who will try to make you believe that guns are a perfectly smart and acceptable thing to have and carry around in everyday life.  I mean, we have people trained to use firearms and have licences to carry them around, concealed in their pants.  And no… I’m not referring to our armed service people.  I’m not referring to police and border patrol, not the coast guard…

I’m talking about regular Joe’s and Janet’s with a want for firepower and an invented reason to use it…

Let me ask you this: If no one in your entire state had a gun, would you want one?  Would you feel you needed one?  Why?  Why not?  I think that the reason people really want guns, deep down in their core, is because they know their neighbor has the right to have one.  Not the right implicitly, but more so the thought that said neighbor could acquire one and in a heated, unyielding and passionate argument with them could shoot them.  That irrational fear fuels the NRA and their minions here in America.

But the insane obsession with gun ownership (legal or illegal) in America isn’t the only issue.  It is reported that Adam’s mother was “stockpiling guns” for some sort of economic collapse-driven apocalypse, but hey… I have friends who are awaiting the zombie apocalypse too… but they aren’t “collecting” or “hoarding” or “stockpiling” guns (the quotes depend on which site you get the story from).  Although, sidenote: Maybe we should? 12/21/12 is only a few days away… i digress…

The media has reported INACCURATE ”facts” about the Connecticut story since only minutes following law enforcement’s arrival on the scene.  The sensationalism! Really??? We’re going to interview traumatized CHILDREN on international news about what happened when they were SHOT AT only moments before??? Oh. That’s perfectly sensible… [insert sarcasm HERE].  When we elevate these criminals to star status and do not use these moments as teaching tools for our population, we make ourselves look ridiculous and shallow.  We make it seem as though the shooter is more important than the lives they take.  And though knowing the motive of any crime is more helpful than not, the fact is that people have formed their own conclusions, even though they are based on the leanings of media organizations and bloggers.  And yes, I’m aware that as a “media outlet” I just made that point.  My goal though, is not to employ the same backwards, ill-serving means and manners the others do.  I as Diva Bleu straddle the line; you as my readers understand that and give me acceptable, but taut leeway.

The Second Amendment was NOT meant for regular people to just collect and store guns; it was meant, as so eloquently put in this post I saw in my Twitter feed, for the formation of  “…a well regulated Militia.”  Last I checked, we have that in our United States Armed Forces and our local Law Enforcement communities.  But I guess I am being to logical, nee, LITERAL about the Second Amendment.

And then, there’s the mental state of the shooter…  again, this is a fact we may never have the full scope of. I understand this.  I suffer from bipolar disorder, as do several of my friends.  I had a period during my teens in which I was angry, often boisterous and occasionally violent.  I was enraged some days and wasn’t sure how to handle it.  No one gave me any viable answers at the time, despite my being in and out of counseling since elementary school.  I walked with a limp.  I was bullied.   I was a child in the middle of a heated divorce.  I was adopted.  I was misunderstood.  I wanted to be loved.

And that is precisely why I said near the beginning of this post that I could believe that Adam was enraged by the thought of his mother having him committed.  I don’t honestly know how I would have felt or reacted had I had that knowledge in one of my “moments” as I came to call them then.  I recall the night my mother told me I was adopted… it was shocking and scary and it made me angry, but at 5 or 6 years old, I was much more afraid of her than ever in life.  She was at least 6 feet tall and no more than 140 pounds.  She was slim, but imposing and to this day I remember some disciplines she inflicted that really taught me a lesson.  But still, I was violent at times with other children (mostly when being bullied, but I bullied as well), and my mouth knew no chill.  I had been “popped in the mouth” many a time but developed a thick skin and somehow knew that no matter what, what I had to say would be relevant.  Most children have a mild understanding of that process, but add a child suffering with “social cues” inside of being afraid, scared, lonely, sad, etc. with your own feelings and thoughts.

Without adequately funded mental health care in America, when we add these factors and others together  you get the perfect storm…

Thank God my mother had quality medical care for me when I was young.  For as much as having a psychologist to talk to helped to keep me calm, had she not had the resources I would have given her even MORE grief.  My mother disciplined me.  My mother was loving.  My mother was kind.  My mother spent her last breath for me.  She died a month after my 10th birthday and to this day, I know she was my last real advocate.  She was the last person to really understand those angry moments I had…  and she was afraid.  My grandmother was too, we had quite a few physical altercations.  And as embarrassing as it is to admit here, my friends and family knew.  And THAT is why I say, I can feel some level of empathy there.  The Anarchist Soccer Mom has written of her own experiences with her son who doesn’t have a diagnosis and has been violent toward her, her family and others.  She is a mother asking for help.  She has written us her, “if I’m not back in 24 hours…” note and here we are in America, coming down off of the media high, blaming everything in sight…

And I understand… this post is probably all over the place…

But I have been saturating in and absorbing all of this in an effort to have a very raw and honest talk wit you all on the show.  I have moved it from Thursday night to Saturday afternoon because I am setting up to speak with a guest that day and Saturday works best.  I hope you will call in and tell me what your thoughts are, what you see in your communities, what you would LIKE to see… let’s open these floodgates and DISCUSS!!!

So, feel free to start in the comments; how do you feel?

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